This week, instead of giving you the 101′s and ABC’s of online dating, I’d like to take a different approach and share my story with you; The reason behind why I became so enthralled with it all and why it works for me. And in order to do so, I must start from the beginning:
As a senior in high school I was quite the character, to say the least. I was an Honor Roll student, 1st Lieutenant in the JROTC, crazy about live Punk and Ska shows and addicted to the internet. I don’t quite recall how I came across my first online dating site, but I do remember what it was called; “Face The Jury.”
On this site you would post photos of yourself with a short bio and other members would judge you on a scale of 1-10. Personally, my score always ranged between an 8 and 8.4 (pats self on back). I don’t believe that FTJ was ever a traditional online dating site, but it is indeed how I met my first internet crush. Obviously, I don’t really need to go into much detail to say that we did not quite work out, but we are still very close friends to this day and I do not regret one second of it.
Shortly after that experience I was introduced to Myspace (another non-traditional online dating site) and little by little I started making new virtual friends and meeting them in person. I dated a few of them, again nothing really worked out in the long run, but my experience there was just a warm up for what was in store for me in the future.
It wasn’t until a few years later that I really started to get hooked. Up until then, I saw online dating as a reliable source, but by no means was it my priority since I would go out several times a week and party like a mad woman. I would meet men in person everywhere I’d go thanks to my “life of the party” attitude and being an extreme extrovert. But this all would soon change.
I’ve always been the type of person who’d jump around from industry to industry, earning me a very diverse resume, but in 2009 my career change went from one extreme to another. I went from being a Trusted Agent with Homeland Security to becoming a Bartender.
Bartending was something I had always been interested in and as soon as I became certified I landed an excellent job at an Irish Pub. I worked Thursday – Monday nights and only had Tuesdays and Wednesdays off. Of course all of my friends had normal jobs and stayed in on my nights off and I refused to date any customers, so my chances of meeting men in person went down-hill.
What was a girl to do?? Well, this girl jumped back onto the Online Dating Wagon and joined Match.com (for the third time, but this time I went in for the kill)! As soon as I joined my inbox was full of emails from men complimenting me, asking me out on dates and some even borderline professing their love for me. Of course, I milked this to the extreme. I was getting to know men from all walks of life and from all over the world; Cuba, Venezuela, Italy, Bavaria, Austria, India, and much, much more.
I immediately started going on dates on my days off or before my shifts started on the weekends. On a slow week I’d go on two dates, but my average was four to five dates a week, all with different men.
Now, I know some of you must be thinking “What a little slut.” Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but that would be far from the case. Sure I was talking to and dating multiple men at once, but most of them did not make it past that first date, and even less made it past a second.
So, with such little success, why did I continue to date this way? Well, I saw it as a game of numbers. If you go on enough dates, you’re bound to meet at least one man that could shine and stand out amongst the others; Aside from the fact that it was just all around fun and exciting.
Mass online dating also helped me figure out exactly what kind of man/qualities I’m looking for. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not one of those girls who walks around with an unrealistic checklist entitled, “The Perfect Man”. There is no such thing as perfect, but dating at high volumes did help me narrow it down to the most important traits in a short amount of time and help me realize that I should never settle for anything less than what I know I deserve. And I’d much rather be single and happy than to be in a relationship with someone I know is not 100% meant for me.
Once again I find myself single and with a complicated schedule. This time I am able to meet men on the random if I wanted to since I have weekends off. However, I have now become really stand-offish when it comes to meeting men at bars and other public places. I honestly do prefer the method of reading a profile and getting an insight on them before engaging in conversation.
It’s like skipping through the B.S. of first impressions. Your first impression for me is what you have to say for yourself to the world; a general insight on you. Not what you think I might want to hear according to where you meet me, what I’m wearing and/or what I’m drinking.
online dating is what I’m most comfortable with, and has yielded the best results for me. It’s something I enjoy and don’t plan on quitting any time soon…Unless I meet my Prince Charming, of course! Until then, I’m hooked and it can only be to your benefit!
This entry was originally posted by me at Singles Warehouse